A painful release

When I was at secondary school, aged about twelve, a new craze hit us. It was the must-have thing and it needed to be fairly visible. It was called a two-penny burn. By rubbing the edge of a two pence coin, hard and rapidly, against the skin of your arm you could soon draw blood and would be left with the required, almost tribal, burn. Shirt sleeves should be partially rolled up to uncover some of the burn but not all of it.

That craze was short-lived for most of us. Parents intervened and, anyway, it was painful and ultimately pointless. For some in our year, though, this was no craze, no passing fad of childish stupidity. This was a cry, and for many a release of inner pain. A valve that could let out some of the emotional pressure kept stored inside.

Despite the best efforts of parents, carers and therapists self-harming has not gone away and, in fact, it can continue or even start in adult life. In my work with children and young adults it features large, an open expression of what often lies within, unexpressed and sometimes unheard.

Who self-harms, what causes self-harm and why do people self-harm? The lists are long and linked largely only by the levels of emotional pain being experienced. Young people report low self-esteem; gaining a momentary sense of being alive when everything else is numb and for others it is the sole element of control in their lives.

What we do know is that self-harming is symptomatic of emotional distress, both consciously and unconsciously felt. It is the unspoken voice that talks to us visually and we need to listen. Self-harm can be shocking but this is about people. Support and understanding comes when we look past labels and remember there is a person in need of help.

This article first appeared in Gallery Magazine