This is a question I am often
asked. Not only by new clients but also by many of my counselling students,
trying to understand if there is a universal sign that can help locate an
answer. And it makes sense; how do we know that we need help?
Life can throw so much at us
and frequently we find ourselves dazed and slightly confused. Perhaps we have
noticed a sudden surge in anxiety or a reticence to do something but without
being able to pin down why. Is this the time to seek help from a
Psychotherapist? A portion of my work is with children and young adults and it
seems that their experience of confusion can be multiplied ten-fold simply
because so many emotions are new or felt in different ways.
Bound up with all of this there
are often social messages. Messages that tell us we should be coping, that what
we are feeling is not that bad; we just need to pull ourselves together and
face it. Doesn’t everyone?
Working with a client at the
end of last year I was struck by how powerful these messages can be. Especially
when they come from significant people in our lives such as family and close
friends. Meeting him for the first time I was immediately aware of the deep
shame he was feeling. So many messages all telling him to cope; to deal with
it. And yet here he was with me.
Perhaps there lies the answer
to the question. We go to a doctor because the pain of a fractured ankle is too
much or not seeking help, impractical. Can it not be same with our mental
health. When the pain is too much or intrudes damagingly into our lives;
perhaps that is the time to seek help.
This article first appeared in Gallery Magazine
This article first appeared in Gallery Magazine
